If I were Santa

December 17, 2014

If I were Santa…


If I were Santa, here are some things I’d leave under the Christmas trees of some people I know.


A bumper sticker for Johnny-in-a-hurry: You keep tailgating, I keep slowing down.


Bumper sticker for a grandson: Weren’t we supposed to have hover cars by now?


Bumper sticker for a friend who procrastinates on his car maintenance: Honk if anything falls off.


Bumper sticker for a relative who puts off replacing his muffler: I can’t hear you over the roar…


Bumper sticker for a friend’s niece: I’m a new driver. Quit honking.


Bumper sticker for a lady who attracts tailgaters like bees to honey: Sorry for driving so close in front of you.


Bumper sticker for my wife: I love my mechanic.


T-Shirt for T.P. Brake & Muffler employees: Mechanics do it best.


Oh, and here’s Santa’s pre-Christmas checklist:

— feed the reindeer.

— polish the sleigh.

— pack discount coupons to T.P. Brake & Muffler (oil changes, tires, brakes, mufflers).

— make sure the sleigh’s windshield wipers are working.


As Santa would say, ho ho ho, Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays.

And brake for reindeer!




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